Saturday, September 7, 2019

All Things Considered... I'd Rather Be in Thedas

Just a short personal post to apologize for the lags in posting, and to admit that I would have probably welcomed joining the Grey Wardens to what my actual Summer included...

Unless I'm transcribing my embarrassing past phone conversations  with friends about Dragon Age characters, I don't usually talk much here about my actual real life. Mostly because this blog is meant to entertain you, not to depress and befuddle you as I navigate the perplexing but mostly boring minefield of my weird, anxiety-ridden  misfit existence, which is mostly punctuated by show tunes, fan art, book quotes, bad poems, and cats.

 And also, because, well, we're here to talk about Dragon Age, darn it, where we all mentally reside at magnificent Skyhold, live bravely, fight superbly, heal magically, drink copiously, and there's always someone around who's dying to date you.

However, I do want to apologize for my absence this past month or so from the blog, as well as from my fanfic postings, for those who follow those. So just a quick overview.

It started in late May. I'd already been mourning the sudden death of a friend, then had some unusual hurdles arise in my freelancing life (which is usually pretty stable), thanks to a few corporate clients who broke contract (two in a single week) when faced with sudden economic downturns unrelated to their PR (which was going fabulously)—events that unfortunately echoed across the rest of my summer. By July, I was also alarmingly not able to access my healthcare benefits or their status, my cat Frodo's formerly mild seizure condition worsened, and my stress level increased to the point that I was constantly sick and began to experience exhaustion, GI issues, and chest pain alarming enough to put me in the hospital (apologizing profusely of course to everyone from the doctors to the nurses to the technicians), certain I was having a heart attack and that I was seriously ill.
My Frodo does not want to go to Mordor.
He just wants chin scritches
Luckily, I lived (I love pleasant surprises!), and I even discovered that I was relatively healthy, so things were temporarily looking up! 

Then 5 days later, one of my two main hard drives failed and I promptly lost 4 terabytes of data... that did not show up on any of my (four!) external hard drives... or on those two paid cloud accounts. I didn't lose work, PR or freelancing product—those backups were successful. However, I did lose a few vital folders directly relating to my fiction in 2019, from my novels, plays and lyrics, to this blog, to my fanfiction (pretty devastating, since that Dragon Age novel The Breakers and the Broken was almost done), and to new works in progress. I'm still working with this, although the drive will be going to data recovery soon, so fingers crossed. But it was a pretty devastating blow.

The drama continued as August arrived (and my credit card bills swelled)... my cat Frodo's seizures reached a point where he needed home vet visits, new tests, exams and new meds, all of which were hugely expensive... Unfortunately, instead of resolving his issues, Frodo did not respond well to the new medication, and instead he required 24-hour monitoring from me for falls and symptoms during acclimation, plus enduring four really scary near-death experiences over the ensuing past three weeks. Luckily, he had his littermate Batty to cuddle him as well, so he had lots of care.

But... it's been interesting.

Frodo being cared for by (and lying on) his little littermate Batty, who cares
for him when he has seizures
The good news is that I'm still here, I've rallied my life and my inspiration and goals, and I'm excited for Fall, and for rebuilding and recovering what I can. Frodo is also much better, and he has acclimated to the medication to the extent that he is much more stable, he's only slightly unsteady, and he's completely back to his funny affectionate self.

But enough real life—we're here to talk about Thedas! Just know that I really appreciate each one of you reading right now, as well as a special few who have put up with my rants, impatience, and bad temper this Summer in our work together, so sending much love and special thanks on this front to Teresa, Julie, Kimberley, Sheha, Liz, Kenna, Stef, Virpi, Nerine, Paul W., Malus, Terrabye, Snark Knight, Anjelica, Lily, Jo, Kim, Cat, Amy, Savvy, Essem, Andrastini, Calwyne, AutographedCat, Iolanthe, Bill, and so many others.

And this also goes for you special folks who have championed and followed me on Twitter, who have supported me on Ko-Fi and Patreon, and who have been patient with the temporary delay in my fanfiction postings on Archive of Our Own. So many times, this summer, when I was tired, sick, sad or frustrated, you and the others in the Dragon Age community were there to provide encouragement and kindness, and I'll never be able to express what that has meant to me. You are all starstuff and I assume you also smell like elfroot (which I headcanon is minty and fresh and magical, like athelas, and which, I'm assuming, is the best scent in the world).

Doodle by Sheha of @AdoribullAddicts
So I hope you'll accept this heartfelt ma serannas for your patience and support! I appreciate you all. I hope your Summers were better than mine... and I look forward to continuing to be inspired by you this Fall.

You have already inspired me, and it means the world.


  1. This comment has been removed by the author.

  2. All the love! <3 You're amazing and I'm so sorry you've had to go through so much.

    (Just deleted last one to log in properly :P)

    1. This is my DISGRACEFULLY late thank-you for your lovely note. It really meant a lot! I hope you're well out there as well...

  3. So much love! I don't use Twitter or I would follow you there.

    Take as much time as you need! I'm sorry your summer went so horribly. But I m also glad things are looking up. This blog is basically my homepage at this point, and I check it all the time.

    <3 <3

    1. Thank you so much, Lunayami! I'm so so sorry this is so ridiculously late -- the notifications on this were messed up. But it truly means a lot -- thanks for the lovely thoughts!

  4. I'm so glad you're ok. <3 health issues with fur babies is just the worst. I voluntarily go through weekly stabbings (dry needling) to reduce pain. I'd get stabbed every day over dealing with a kitty health crisis. Also physical illness from stress is TOO REAL.


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