'Twas the Night Before Wintersend... (A Visit from Ashe'bellanar...)

A visit from Flemeth for the holidays

Just a silly little confection, hug, and thank you to you Dragon Age friends who have made my life so rich and meaningful, especially in one of the toughest years of my life (and, I know, so many of our lives).

It's goofy, but I hope you enjoy...

Note 1: I have been schooled that I should have used Satinalia, not Wintersend here, but I still think "Wintersend" sounds better. Oops! Oh well.)

Note 2: I've broken up the poem thematically if clunkily, so it's easier to read—it's just meant to be a fun exercise so I'm totally not keeping things formal, here...

A Visit from Ashe'bellanar (The Night Before Wintersend)

'Twas the night before Wintersend, and all through the Keep

Not a creature was stirring, all Skyhold asleep!

A stillness and silence filled all Herald's Rest

While up in the Rookery ravens did nest

Both mages and templars were snug in their beds,

As gingerbread Fade spirits danced in their heads

Meanwhile, up in my quarters, in halla PJ's

I'd just gone to bed for the first time in days,

When out on the steps there arose such a clatter,

I sprang from my Free Marches bed -- "What's the matter?"

Then I ran to my balcony quick as a dance

Just hoping that I wouldn't see Corypants

The moon on the battlements shone with a glow

Gave the luster of Veil-Fire to objects below

When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,

But a dragon and sleigh, it was actually here!

As it circled, it changed, and then oh, Maker's Breath,

I knew in a heartbeat that this was Flemeth! 

More regal than gods with her Hair Horns of Awesome

Her armor with touches of Arlathan blossom

"Now, Solas, now Seeker, now Varric," she called

"Now up, Iron Bull, Sera, Vivienne and Blackwall!

Get you up Leliana, and Josie, and Cullen

I bring Wintersend cheer, so you'd best not look sullen!

Up, Inky and Cole, and up, Dorian, boo!

And oh come all ye Chargers, and Maryden, too!

Sutherland and Scout Jim, come away from your stalking

I've got trinkets galore, so you better get walking!

But I won't wait forever, I've got things to do!

I just thought that I'd stop with a present or two.

So come down now to greet me or off I will fly!"

And so downstairs we tumbled, with our hair all awry.

And there in the courtyard, she stood with her sleigh

And eight tiny halla, already munching some hay

With a big bag of presents, at least twelve feet tall

She handed them round to us, Chargers and all!

There were goodies and treats and delectable things

And funny gifts too, like small toy nugs with wings

There was cocoa for Bull, and a dragon-tooth pile

That was perfect for weapons or one kadan's smile

There were kittens for Cole and a hat even wider

Plus a fine quill for Varric and a barrel of cider

A beard kit made Blackwall give Flemeth a blush

As he'd never seen anything nearly as plush

Fine thieves' tools gave Sera new chances for mayhem

And a fresh deck of cards tempting those that would play them

A new Swords and Shields to thrill Cass with each word

Plus new lute strings for Maryden's unsecret chord.

For Dorian, some fine ancient tomes of enchantment

To inspire him to further magical advancement

There were new paints for Solas in colors divine

And glasses just perfect for sweet elven wine

There were bangles and lutestrings and slippers for Leli

And tea cakes for Josie with Antivan jelly

There were potions for Inky and salve for the Mark

And an elfroot bouquet for when times got too dark

Then for Cullen a how-to on quick roof repair

And a silverite brooch for one Madame de Fer

For Lace Harding some beautiful blooms to bemuse

And bright armor for Sutherland's personal use

For gruff Cabot some barrels of Orlesian mead

While new runes gave Dagna the magic she'd need

There were new raven cages for Plucky's elites

New blankets for Schmooples and dracolisk treats

Plus a barrel of mint to make cats play with zeal

And cheese to give mice a more sumptuous meal

The bag it was endless and obviously magical 

Filled with fine gifts and not one of them tragical

For Skyhold's found family it was a delight

Filled with comfort and joy (and no plaidweave in sight!)

And then giving a nod and a wink from her eye

Flemeth leaped to the sleigh and then took to the sky

The Skyholders all cheered as the Witch took a lap

Round the battlements high where the brave banners flap

Observed Dorian, "The magisters had up their sleeves

Rare spells such as Flemeth has shown us this eve."

Yet as the sleigh vanished ('twas just before twelve, then)

She called back, "It is not Tevinter, but elven."

So let us heed Flemeth's wise seasonal call

And cry, "Happy Wintersend!" and ar lath ma to you all!

The State of Dumped, Drunk and Dalish—and Upcoming Expanded Content!

Hello, you!

I hope this finds you well. 

I wanted to update you on some new changes you'll see to my blog here, and on future plans for blog formatting and organization, as well. I'm gonna be doing some new things here!

Cleanup and Organization

First off, I know there's a lot of content here to try to wade through, and it's a little confusing, so I've done some housecleaning to try to make stuff easier for you to find.

I've now organized Dragon Age posts by topic, and in smaller groups so that you can more quickly find what you're interested in. 

These new categories include:

• Useful Dragon Age Lore Analyses
• Dragon Age Trailer Analyses
• Dragon Age Interviews and Transcripts
• Solas: Character, Goals, Romance
• Iron Bull and the Qun
• Friends, Enemies, Companions (Analyses)
• Personal Updates, Silly Stuff and Flights of Fancy
• Additional Dragon Age Analyses (Alphabetical)
• Dragon Age Fandom Links...

Eventually (see way down) I will be mirroring this blog onto a section of my new website that will enable me to sort everything in a more logical way, but I hope this helps in the meantime.

Dragon Age Content Going Forward

I also wanted to let you know that I am going to be committing to at least two Dragon Age posts per month going forward. It's really important to me to maintain that.

With this in mind, here are some post topics I have in progress:

• Cole at the Crossroads (Spirit or Human)
• Leliana Character Analysis (arc across all 3 games plus Trespasser)
• The Choices of Thom Rainier
• Meaningful Banters: Viv Plays Tamassran
• Solas's Romance, Part 5 (THE WORST DATE EVER)
• Fenris Analysis (Dragon Age II)
• Alistair: The Hidden Prince
• Plus tons of "Trespasser" character analysis

But what do YOU want to see that I haven't covered yet—or that I haven't covered enough? I know I have characters I haven't addressed yet, and I will get to each of them! Eventually.

I am also going to be putting a lot more work into my poor barely launched YouTube channel, so more on that later, and I hope to be posting some video versions of my most popular posts here, as well as some interviews with other Dragon Age fans and analysts in our community that I will release as videos and podcasts. So, lots of great stuff on the way!

Going Beyond Dragon Age (New Content)

Meanwhile, I'm kind of excited and nervous to announce that I am also going to start posting new content on here that is not directly applicable to Dragon Age. 

This doesn't mean I'm gonna stop writing about Dragon Age—never! But I have a lot of thoughts about a LOT of things, and they are interests shared by a lot of you folks, too.

So let's talk about more than Dragon Age! 

With this in mind, I am going to be regularly adding columns about Critical Role—all heavily spoilered posts, and on all campaigns past and present, and which will eventually move to its own section.

Note: I'm working on a new website that will encompass Dumped, Drunk & Dalish as well as my upcoming Critical Role analyses and other fandom writings, so thanks for bearing with me until I get that done.

Other fandom subjects I'll be writing about here will include a bunch of potential topics past and present, just wherever I see resonance to current news or reason to reexamine:

• Mass Effect (all games)
• Loki
• The Lord of the Rings
• Gaming
• Supernatural
• Killing Eve
• Community
• Shadow and Bone
• Marvel Movie Moments and Characters
• Doctor Who
• The Witcher
• Penny Dreadful
• The Mandalorian
• The Magicians
• Into the Border Lands (and other streamed TTRPGs in addition to Critical Role)
• Sherlock Holmes
• Fandom ships and shipping
• Fictional Villains (and Why Are They So Damn Hot?)

(Yes, more bullet points. I can't help it. They're so ORGANIZED! Sigh.)

Meanwhile, I'm gonna talk about my health stuff again for a few moments, so bear with me below. Or skip to the next section! I won't judge...

Inspirations and Motivations (the Point of All This Stuff)

So here's the thing. As you probably saw from my earlier post on this, I almost shuffled off this mortal coil back in March when I went into heart failure. And it was one of those things that happens where (if you're me, anyway), you go, HOLY SHIT, I HAD SO MUCH I WANTED TO WRITE ABOUT! I'm not kidding. I was pissed.

There's nothing fun about lying on a gurney near death and thinking about all the things you didn't get to say or do. It affected me very powerfully, and still affects me now—and I swear, I know, I know, I keep talking about it! I promise this is the last time! But this is important for me to share because it is what has inspired me in these latest blog changes going forward.

Over the past three months, I've had to learn how to walk all over again, I'm still on oxygen, and after hours of physical therapy, have only just graduated to using a cane for short distances. Recovering from this has been the hardest thing I have ever done. I never knew exhaustion that went all the way through muscle and bone. I never knew that simply walking across a room with a walker would feel like hiking a mile. I'd never imagined a level of tiredness so deep that I didn't have the mental or physical energy to write a text. That trying to keep up with my freelance work would feel like scaling Everest (because I'm a freelancer, I was working the day I came home, as best I could, to try to keep myself afloat). Even writing short e-mails and updates was challenging. 

The tiredness was just all-encompassing. My first month home from the hospital, I was so tired that I fell asleep constantly and hilariously everywhere—living room, kitchen, bathroom (overshare! BUT SO FUNNY), dining table, at my desk, during Zoom meetings (luckily I wasn't on camera, wasn't snoring, and evidently only nodded off for a few seconds at a time). Seriously. Everywhere. 

But slowly I've gained back strength, and man, has that been humbling. I will never, ever again take walking or mobility or independence for granted. The first time I was able to walk in the hospital? I cried. Because I'd spent seven days contemplating the very real possibility that I would need months of rehab before doing so again, if I ever would at all. So—on the positive side, every step forward since then has been literal, and something for me to celebrate.

Although heart failure is a permanent condition on some levels, there's a lot I can do, and have been working toward, to get to my best possible prognosis. My physical therapists are fantastic people and making them proud has been a huge achievement for me. Thanks to this effort, and their help, eventually I will be back to nearly full health and mobility, and will ironically also end up in my best physical shape of the past decade or so. It's awesome! 

Except for the scary statistics emphasized by my Terminator cyborg doctor a week ago. Not to get maudlin, but while I'm doing great and working really hard to recover physically, the fact is that while I'm young for congestive heart failure (it was a perfect storm of combined factors exacerbated by lockdown—watch your salt intake, peeps!), it doesn't change the fact that 50% of people with my condition are dead in the first year. 80% of those diagnosed with it die within five years. 

Meaning, I have a 2 in 10 chance of seeing 5 years.

Freakages and Flailings

Did I freak out about these statistics? Yeah. I did. I'd already done a hell of a lot of soul-searching over the past few months, and this just kicked me into an even higher gear of evaluation and goal-setting. 

So if I seem to be a little all over the place lately—if I seem like I'm oversharing right, left, and center, well—apologies. But yeah, I am. And I'll probably keep doing it. Because I just want to be however I am. I want to be a little more honest. I want to cut down on the bullshit that doesn't matter. I want to enjoy whatever time I have and do so being myself and expressing myself. I want to champion wonderful people and causes, I want to be brave, and kind, and engaged. I want to end every day knowing I did my best to live fully.

Please know that I'm going to work really hard to stick around, but no matter what, I want to write things I'm passionate about, that I care about, and that are fun to discuss and analyze. I'm also going to be working a lot harder on my outside stuff—my fiction (including fanfics), plays, et cetera. 

I don't have kids, so my words are the only legacy I have, and they mean a lot to me. I want to be remembered.

Expanding Horizons

So that's part of it. I want to write and discuss all these characters and ideas we all bond over, and I hope some of these new topics will be fun or interesting for us to discuss together, too!

The other part of this is that I really want to earn people's support in a bigger-picture way, if they want to act on that support (no pressure!). Meaning, stuff like Patreon or however else you or anyone wants to support or share my work. I have not been a good Patreon artist thus far, but that is changing NOW, and if you already support me, hang in there, and I will come through for you with stuff that's only for you. 

Ultimately, I've spent two decades prior to this like most freelancers, writing content I was extremely proud of, but that didn't touch my heart. I've waited long enough. The more I write, I hope, the more  I will connect with all of you as well as new audiences. And, if I earn it, the more support I'll get. Everybody wins!

I am passionate about magic, about genre fiction in all its forms. I love fantasy. I love other worlds. I want to play them, watch them, read them, write them, and explore them. And then I want to talk about them with fellow fans and friends like you.

So I hope you'll support me and come along.

A Little Magic in a Stressful World

Thanks for this chance to update you, and for bearing with me on this very strange, scary, yet often wonderful journey over the past three or four years. You have no idea what it means to me to have gained your attention and readership, as well as (in so many cases!) your friendship and support through some difficult and dark times. 

The past few years especially, as we've all battled COVID restrictions, fear, isolation, and more, I have watched the Dragon Age community come through for each other, mourn losses, show kindness, and share lightness and humor when we all needed it. I've watched Dragon Age writers and artists tirelessly answer questions even when the questioners were rude or dismissive (luckily, a minority). I've watched Dragon Age team leaders champion the fan artists among us every single day. And I've been so humbled by how many at BioWare have supported our celebration of Dragon Age Day and helped us achieve our fundraising goals even when many of these people were exhausted already from work, deadlines, and COVID.

So we're in a pretty comfortable little corner of our fandom at the Herald's Rest, and I feel lucky to be a part of that. Those of you who read or follow me, you're amazing. And you're the reason so many of us in our community (including me) got through lockdown as semi-unscathed as we did.

Ultimately, I hope the blog updates and changes mean you'll stop by here more than before, not less. But we'll see how it goes—and I hope you'll let me know your thoughts on what I can improve, what I can add, and what would mean most to you.

Thanks as always, and take care out there...

Angela

Dragon Age Answers to the Batman Question... (NSFW)

Warning: NSFW implications and scenarios galore.

So you know that Batman bedroom scenario that had Twitter spontaneously combusting the other day? You know the one. About whether or not the Dark Knight would take a tour, ahem, downtown on a night with Catwoman. Otherwise known as The Greatest Conversation in the History of Twitter?

I thought it would be naughty fun to address this via Dragon Age characters, so see my takes below. I saw this discussed in a few places casually on Twitter, but want to shout out to Squonk, who posted a conversation that inspired me to do my own take on this. 

Note: Depending on their sexual orientation, let's just say that we're asking whether the character would take that tour with a partner of their appropriate gender.

Another Note: I forgot a few people! Bethany! Krem! A few others! So I've added them. Along with a few stupid comments that I forgot originally, so I hope they're good for a laugh. Many thanks to readers Rob and Kirsty for the reminder!

I'm probably gonna be sheepish I wrote this, but it was fun, and we all need a little fun in the world right now. So, onward!

The Warden
The world's ending any minute now, I feel safe in saying they absolutely would.

Alistair
Would have to be talked through it, probably also with diagrams, but sure. He would blush afterward and also send flowers.

Leliana
She's a bard who loves women, and who is highly skilled in the arts of the bedroom. What do you think? Those smallclothes would be off faster than you can say... smallclothes.

Morrigan
Definitely would, but I'm kind of thinking she'd be one of those "I gave you five minutes, now give me an hour" kinds of foreplay types. 

Sten
Hell, yes. He's Qunari—while they're repressive and disturbing as a whole, they do seem to be a culture that is very sex-positive even if aromantic, and during his time as a Companion he's totally doing the Qunari equivalent of visiting Europe, anyway. Don't @ me.

Oghren
I think he'd be willing, but the question is—would he stay conscious long enough? I just don't see that happening. Nope.

Wynne
Not... yet? I think she'd be willing, but I think she's had lousy luck so far (it's why I ship her with Zevran after he flirts with her in Origins, since he would absolutely rock her world). Let's be real—her previous sexual escapades were probably all hasty stolen moments in various dusty dark corners of the mage tower. And they never lasted more than four minutes at a time. (And now I'm depressed.)

Zevran
He finds the question hilarious, and has over two dozen favorite approaches and techniques, some of which both begin and end with an erotic massage. And yes, it would be ridiculously awesome.

Shale
"What a bizarre and useless question about those stupid, soft and fleshy beings."

Loghain Mac Tir
Nuh-uh. I don't think so. Look at all that tension. This is not the face of a man who's ever had a really happy sexual experience. Or given one.

Urthemiel
"Nobody ever asks what I need. Nobody ever asks if I'm a caring, gentle and considerate lover. Nope. It's all, 'Whine, whine, whine! Why'd you have to bring the Darkspawn? Blight, Blight, Blight!' and I'm sick of it."

Anders
Yep. You'd have pretty great sex, he'd be generous and satisfying, and then you'd look out your window and his moving van would already be parked right there at the curb. Still, there are worse trade-offs. I'm just saying.

Justice
"Are you being humorous? No. This question is immaterial and a waste of time."

Nathaniel Howe
I'm kind of seeing Nat as the sexual equivalent of a middle-of-the-road steak dinner. Like, nothing super-creative there, but the arrow would find its target. (Oh, that was really bad. Really, really, really bad.)

Sigrun
She'd be funny and caring, one of those "rogue in the streets, stole your sheets" types.

Velanna
Yes, but it would be tense, passive-aggressive, and slightly perfunctory. And she wouldn't call you afterward.

Teagan Guerrin
No. Just look at what happens to that man from Origins to "Trespasser." That is the face of a profoundly disappointed person right there. Nope. Never a single fun night in his entire life. What a waste of Hot Young Teagan! I blame Isolde.

Duncan
Yeah, I'm thinking a definite yes on that one. Duncan was a bit of a rascal in his early years, so this is not a guy afraid of a trip to the Deep Roads, is what I'm saying.

Hawke
All three colors are a resounding yes no matter what. Blue Hawke spoons after, Red Hawke doesn't. If it's Purple Hawke, there would be brief spoonage and then probably something humorous like farts or hiccups.

Cullen
Based on his adorable uptightness and his panic during even basic flirtation scenarios, I'm gonna go with a soft no on this one. I'm not saying he wouldn't eventually get there, but he'd definitely need to meet the right woman (thousands immediately raise their hands to volunteer). He's spent a lot of his life focusing on work and guilt, so to me his romance in Inquisition just makes me think there's not a ton of reach and flexibility in that corner of his life as yet.

Flemeth
If you could get past the subtly terrifying "I'll probably kill you when I'm done" aspect of Flemeth's sex life, she was probably a total blast as well as wickedly creative in her day when it came to romantic shenanigans. Absolutely yes.

Isabela
"Oooh, aren't you funny, you!" (Cheerfully and promptly demonstrates superior technique on the person asking the question. Bonus points if it's Catwoman.)

Varric
Of course he does, he's got a great imagination and is actually famous for writing blushworthy fictional romantic torrid scenarios.  And I'm sure he's had his share of opportunities, trysts, and admirers. 

And yet, in Varric's ongoing day to day life? It's a bit tragic, as his primary experience seems to have been with Bianca, and that is just really a waste of all that dwarfly sexiness. My question is, does he practice on the person, or the crossbow? Or... both?

Aveline
See also Cullen. That's a no. 

Cassandra
Absolute yes. Classic example of  someone who doth protest too much. Nobody reads that much Swords & Shields who isn't gonna be secretly delightful in the kip.

Fenris
Yes, and it would be very intense and dramatic. He'd probably get glowy at certain moments.

Merrill
"Did I miss something dirty?" My favorite thing about Merrill is that she is a paradox—an innocent who is completely free of sexual hangups, very much like the character of Jester in Critical Role, Campaign 2. In all seriousness, I always kind of ship her with Isabela, so yes. 

The Arishok
Absolutely would, and I'm not gonna say anything else because, anyway... yeah. (I'll... be in my bunk.)

Sebastian
Oh, no no no, my Andrastian ears and whiskers, no. Nope. Nope. Nope. Not ever. Or at least—not after his vows! Before is another matter entirely.

Tallis
Tallis would combine the Qun's no-nonsense sexual wisdom and technique with a sweet, funny, sparkly running dialogue that would either be annoying or adorable, or probably both.

Carver
Would be willing, but he'd also be the type to get someone interested down at The Hanged Man and then he'd complain and complain and complain for so long that they'd get that fixed expression on their face, escape when he paused for breath, and Carver'd never realize he just lost the chance to hook up. Poor grumpy bro.

Bethany 
Hmmm... she's very proper and sweet. But she's also incredibly empathetic and wants people around her to feel joy, so hey, this would be one way for her to do that. I'm just sayin'. So Bethany's a yes.

Meredith
I'm gonna say no. And all of Kirkwall will pay just because she couldn't find a healthier way to relieve stress.

Orsino
He's got this sort of slinky, super-feline quality to him that makes me think yep. Also, yes, part of me kind of ships Orsino with Meredith because he's probably exactly what she needs in the bedroom department. Just think, he could have saved the city with a daring proposition and a few glasses of Antivan wine!

The Inquisitor
Oh, depending on your character build and preferences, sure. And the Mark could also be an added bonus in certain scenarios. Sorry/not sorry.

Solas
He's thousands of years old, dating back to one of the most decadent, hedonistic eras in an intensely magical world, and for extra fun, he can paint the dream world of the Fade to be anything he wants it to be. In other words, there is nothing the Dread Wolf hasn't done in the sack as long as it's adult and consenting, and I'm talking genders, participants, etc. Nada. He's had the world tour several times over, and by now, he knows what he likes and knows how he likes it. (Confirmed preferences include dominating, er, focus, and probably lots of booty stuff. And don't forget the 'dominating focus.').

(stares into middle distance)

Wait, where was I?

ADDED NOTE: I can't help it! I keep picturing The Iron Bull and Solas making a trip to the store for bondage supplies, and then sharing notes on which materials they find most effective.

"But what about this stuff?" asks Bull. "It's great for adjusting tension, and it's on sale!"

"Nonsense," replies Solas. "It tangles easily and has no flexibility at all."

"But it's on sale!" cries Bull. "I could tie up half of Skyhold!"

"Nevertheless," says Solas. "It is important to be discerning in these matters if you wish the object of your affection to be satisfied." 

"Little asshole," grumbles Bull. "Everyone's satisfied with The Iron Bull."

"Undoubtedly," says Solas. "However, to keep it that way, I would go with my rope, not yours."

(Sorry. We now return you to your original posted content.) 

The Iron Bull
Oh, gosh, I don't know. You think? (hysterical laughter) Personally, I'm guessing for Bull that third base is practically his version of a good night kiss. 

ADDED NOTE: I keep visualizing this scenario in my head and it's been cracking me up for a few days now—Bull on the porch at the end of a date, and instead of a good-night kiss, just going right in for third base, and his date going, "Oh! Oh, my. Okay. Um, let's go inside." Although let's face it, anybody who ends a night with Bull with a kiss on the porch  just missed out on one of life's great moments, anyway. Sheesh, people.

But honestly, the best summation I can give of Bull's scenario is from my friend SeekerCat5500 over on Twitter, who wrote, "There's not one aspect of his lover's body that Iron Bull wouldn't dine on like a starving man at a feast."

She's not wrong. Also, woof.

(stares into middle distance)

Huh?

Krem
Handsome, smart, sweet, and dryly funny, I feel like Krem is basically perfect, so let's just say that I think he would be generous, attentive and very successful in this situation. However, I'd also guess that he'd have probably had a few insightful conversations with Bull, who would have given him lots of humorous advice on technique, combined with a few combat metaphors ("Don't rush right in! Vary your responses! Occasionally go for the unexpected, where they're weakest!" etc.) 

Dalish
She'd be a little bit impatient, she's got things to do and people to see and bad guys to shoot with a spell arrow: "There. No, there. No. Right there. Yes. No, you're in the wrong spot. Yes!" And at some point, she'd say the sexual equivalent of, "It's a bow." But dirtier.

Grim
Grim would grunt mysteriously a few times, then jump right in and make the recipient pretty happy in a businesslike fashion.

Sera
Shite, nobody even needs to ask this question because of course she does. In this scenario she is definitely Sera was Ever not Sera was Never.

Cole
(He pauses thoughtfully for a full minute)
"I don't think those two things go together. But also, you should talk to ______ because they think of nice things when they look at you, and then they smile." 

Blackwall
I think it could go either way. I'm gonna say, Blackwall, no. But when he's free to be Thom Rainier again? I'm gonna go with yes on this one. I think he'd be a people pleaser.

Scout Harding
Yes? I don't know. Sure, in a happy demi scenario with a trusted companion? 

Vivienne
"Oh, darling, how funny of you. Anyone approaches within a foot of that part of my body and they get a permanent case of Winter's Chill."

Dorian
Yes, and everyone's curtains go up in flames. If you know what I mean, and I think you do.

Cabot
Let's face it, with his clever moods and "words of the day," our sly barkeep is quite the cunning linguist.

Bram Kenric
"Oh, goodness, well let me see, I've been so focused on getting tenure, so this is a bit awkward. It certainly isn't like any of the  more scholarly descriptions I've read in books. It's a bit daunting, to be honest.  However, I'm willing to give it a try. Wish me luck!" Then at some point in the proceedings, he would injure himself on the bedpost, pass out, and require at least ten stitches.

Svarah Sun-Hair
"Ah! No. Wait a moment. Your tongue is as clumsy as a hold-beast's. It appears to me that while you are willing to please, you perhaps require further proper instruction. I will provide it. Begin again."

Corypheus
Look, say what you will about Corypants, but he's got to be an absolute dervish in the sack. Anything goes. He's totally got one of those bedrooms with weird colored lights and stuff too. And don't forget the striped stockings!

Josephine
No, I feel like she's a gentle ace who would probably rather not go there. But that she's very romantic in her own way and with the right partner.  

Sutherland
"Yes, ma'am, thank you, ma'am, a little higher? Sure. No, hold on. Left? Wait, was that a good sound or a bad one?"

Jim (Cullen's Attache)
Oh absolutely. He's still writing torrid fanfiction about the day when Cullen finally succumbs to his forbidden secret passions and realizes their love.

______________________________________________

What's your take? And what did I get wrong? 

Meanwhile, I regret nothing.

NOTE: Just a friendly reminder that if you enjoy my blog, tweets, or Dragon Age analyses, I'd welcome a coffee on Ko-Fi or some support on Patreon.

Adventures in Lockdown...

It's been six months. Six months!

And I've had so many posts in progress, so much that I wanted to post and say here, that I just wasn't able to get to. I didn't mean this space to become so silent.

So what happened?

Wait, I can answer that, actually. This stressful, worrisome, mixed-up, scary, frustrating year.

So I hope, first and foremost, that this finds you well and safe, despite the stressful times and traumas we've all been undergoing.

As for me, I'm okay, but it's been a wild ride the past few months. In March—just a little over two months ago—I almost died of congestive heart failure. I didn't even know I was sick! I spent over two weeks in the hospital, where I gained a whole new appreciation for things like life, health, and little things I'd taken for granted... like walking. And breathing.

It's been a pretty humbling experience—I'm still on the walker and oxygen for at least another few weeks, but honestly the entire thing feels like a gift. Like many of us, I'd had some economic and mental health challenges over this past year in dealing with the Covid era, lockdown, and everything that had gone along with them. I battled occasional depression, and my anxiety had also been through the roof.

But almost dying can really simplify your outlook. It also got me to realize how lucky I am in so many ways, and to stop being so damn hard on myself. I'm here, I'm alive, and I'm incredibly lucky to be so.

And I've missed writing this blog, and I've missed you all.

So thanks for hanging in there! I've just posted a new piece on Varric that I've been working on for MONTHS, and I promise there'll be more to come.

Meanwhile, take care of yourself, and keep in touch. I'm so grateful you're still reading, and it means the world.

Fund My Kickstarter to Make "DREAMS, DRAGONS, AND DREAD WOLVES" Criticism Book a Reality!

CASSANDRA: The Inquisition! You're not planning to write a book about us, are you?

Hello, fellow Thedosians!

After over three years of writing this blog of criticism and exploration of Dragon Age, I'm excited and humbled to announce that I'm Kickstarting a full-length nonfiction criticism book on Dragon Age, called Dreams, Dragons, and Dread Wolves. I'm so excited I'm a mess. I'm speaking Qunlat and elven to strangers. I give weird looks to mirrors. You get the idea.

But it's happening at last. Dreams, Dragons, and Dread Wolves will offer an array of in-depth analyses, critiques and explorations of Dragon Age: Inquisition, its companions and advisors, and its villain/antihero Solas. The book will also include my predictions and theories for Dragon Age 4 after the revelations of the DAI DLCs ("The Descent," "Jaws of Hakkon," and "Trespasser"), as well as those of Tevinter Nights and the tempting teasers released by the BioWare team. And all in a collectible hardcover book.

My hope is that this is a must for fans of Dragon Age, and if the project is funded, would be completely unique as the world's only independent and comprehensive literary and critical analysis on Thedas in print.

The Project in a Nutshell

After falling in love with Dragon Age, what I've always really wanted was to create a book of criticism that wasn't like anything else out there on gaming or RPGs, that offered critiques of this gorgeous series that treated the writing and worldbuilding with respect—and that analyzed them on a formal, even literary level. Or at least, that was my goal. I haven't always succeeded—I still feel like I should have written more, covered more characters. But I have made headway in the past 3-4 years, with more than 110 blog posts and ridiculous walls of text. And it's been a blast.

I love the world of Thedas, so this book is something I've dreamed of creating. Coming this close to realizing that goal, I can't tell you what it means to me. Now let's take a look at the project in a nutshell:

• GOALS: $12,500 to fund an eBook and limited collectible print run of a special hardcover edition that offers a complete, in-depth and entertaining critical analysis of the world, characters, romances, and quests in DRAGON AGE INQUISITION.
• STRETCH GOALS: $20,000 will expand the book by adding a FULL section of chapters on DRAGON AGE ORIGINS characters, romances and story. $27,500 in stretch funding will add another FULL section of chapters on DRAGON AGE II characters, romances, and story. $35,000 will add a section of detailed analyses and discussions of ALL Game DLCs. $40,000 will add a section of analyses on ALL DRAGON AGE NOVELS, MOVIES AND COMICS. There's plenty more content I can add from there (including timelines, quest analyses per game that include ALL quests, etc.), so let's see how it goes!
• EBOOK: All formats
• HARDCOVER PRINT RUN (EMBOSSED COLLECTIBLE): 250/500/1000/2000/more copies (possible via stretch goals, depending on demand).
• PAGES: Approximately 450 (although this will be more if stretch goals are met)
• DELIVERY DATE: APRIL 2021
• KICKSTARTER FUNDING TARGET: $12,500 or above for hardcover print run at cost; $25,000 or higher to cover writing, editing and additional fees, as well as higher print runs (and print extras such as higher page counts, flocked pages, and more.
• REWARDS AND GOODIES: I will be editing these as the project moves along, and hope to be able to add more rewards and goodies to come. 
• KICKSTARTER LINK: Find and fund my project at https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/dreadwolf/dreams-dragons-and-dread-wolves/.
  
  And thanks for whatever you can contribute! And no pressure -- if you can't support me right now, I hope you'll share where you can with other Dragon Age and gaming friends. 

The Details

The book is written by me, and is a heavily expanded version of my posts and analyses right here on "Dumped, Drunk and Dalish." But the book isn't just going to be some kind of rehash of previous blog posts—instead, what I'm doing here is to take every single Inquisition-focused blog post I made about the larger history of the game, its companions, heroes, villains, advisors, and NPCs, as well as peoples including spirits, demons, the Evanuris, Tevinter, the Qunari, the Chantry, and beyond—and I'll be expanding, updating, and re-ordering those elements into chapters and themes that move us through the backstory of Dragon Age Inquisition chronologically, as well as by emotion and approach. 

Story, Companion, Romance, and Loyalty Quest Analyses

The book will include character analyses from those you've seen here, on The Iron Bull, to Solas, Cullen, Cole, and many more, to those not yet posted to my blog, on key figures from Leliana, Josephine, Dorian, Blackwall, Varric, and Vivienne, to Krem, Celene, Briala,  and dozens of other major characters across Dragon Age Inquisition.

I'll also be including an analysis of the main story plot from beginning to end (and major Inquisitor quests), Companion analyses (including all loyalty quests), and detailed analysis and discussion of all game romances—from Solas, Cullen, Sera, Josie, Cassandra, Blackwall, Dorian, and The Iron Bull, to Adoribull, to the quiet flirtations of Blackwall and Josephine, of Maryden and her three different potential suitors (Krem, Cole, and Zither) and of Scout Harding to a smitten Inquisitor. I also take a look at unromanceable characters and their relationships, like Varric's complex relationship with Bianca, or Vivienne's secret tenderness for Bastien.

From old to new, all of these chapters will move fluidly one after the other, section by section, and each chapter will bring a new exploration and perspective. I'll also be including discussion of Companions with high Disapproval of our Inquisitors, and how those Disapprovals can change the game.

Right now in semfinal draft form, it's about 115 chapters organized across seven sections. 

Promo Decisions

As far as where this work fits into the fandom world of Dragon Age, I want to be blunt and transparent, and to note how supportive BioWare and so many team members have been when it comes to my blog, and how grateful I am to them all. So many writers, devs, and artists (and more) have always been kind, accessible, and interactive, and I can't thank them enough.

For this reason and so many more, from a big-picture standpoint, I've done everything I can here to plan and create something that's legal nonfiction criticism and discussion, and wholly unique (I hope). AND... separate.

That's why I'm attempting to fund my book without asking for my acquaintances and friends at BioWare to share it, because I don't want to put them in any position to feel conflicted, and because I worry that even if they did support my project, such shares or likes might constitute some kind of endorsement, or put them in a position of having to feel used by me as some kind of conduit. They're good and generous people who work way too hard, and I don't want to make their lives more difficult in any way.

Ultimately, while this book is a real culmination for me, just know that it won't end my blog or my love for this universe. Dreams, Dragons, and Dread Wolves simply gives me a different way to criticize, discuss, and celebrate the world BioWare has given us.

Thanks for Supporting!

I know these are tough times for everyone. We're all battling our own Breach in the sky right now, so just know that I'd be truly privileged simply to fund the eBook and smallest print run. However, it would be amazing to achieve stretch goals, so that I can get the project to the point where I can guarantee a larger print run, to offer content on ALL games, and earn some income to cover the years this project has taken me to prepare. But fingers crossed!

Please note that the book is currently primarily focused on the main game world and Inquisition, but I will add commensurate (huge) sections and chapters on Origins, Dragon Age II, the DLCs, novels, movies and more, as stretch goals are achieved.

More on this in the next few weeks—and thanks! Please stay safe out there, okay?

Fade, Take Me Away! (Ma Serannas for the Hiatus)

Hello, all you beautiful kadans!

Just a quick wave to send out my apologies, albeit into an unexpectedly crazy world, after my unforgivably long blog hiatus. It's the first one I've ever taken of anywhere near this length, and I hugely apologize.

Basically, I've been battling some hurdles and life suckage. I'm totally rallying, but it's a work in progress. So I appreciate your patience—and wanted to at least give an accounting of sorts.

Also, apologies in advance, but there are cats ahead. Lots of cats. I mean, like, pet stuff. Love and loss. Proceed at your peril.

Highs and Lows

On the non-sucky side, thanks to some truly generous support from BioWare talents and fans, Dragon Age Day 2019 was incredible, and our best celebration ever of BioWare and the Dragon Age world we love so much. It even let me interview by e-mail and phone/videochat some of my favorite people on the planet, people I respect so much not just for their creativity and genius, but for their palpable kindness: warrior and advocate Steve Spohn of Able Gamers, the always witty and brilliant John Epler (Narrative Director for the Dragon Age series), the equally witty, talented and charming writers Mary Kirby and Brianne Battye (another dream Internet conversation for me), and of course, superhero editor/writer couple Karin and Patrick Weekes. 

I mean, seriously, people, those interviews were so glorious and lovely they probably cured my flu for the next decade (hopefully they transfer a few powers against coronavirus, aghghgh). Regardless, those conversations will stay with me forever, and will continue to inspire me as an artist. I'm so blessed.

After the Celebration...

But the event and its interviews and transcriptions was also pretty taxing, and I was still recovering from two bouts of the flu in six weeks. So while I was thrilled beyond belief to once again be a part of helping to stage this year's successful event, I also kind of collapsed and spent 2-4 weeks with very few coherent thoughts afterward (I think "Fire bad, tree pretty" pretty much sums it up).

On the plus side, already, I can't wait for next year. The Dragon Age Day team—led by the immortal Imasithduh and so many other equally talented, brilliant and hardworking members—as well as its players, supporters, and fans, are the best people anywhere.

But it capped off a pretty unrelenting Fall, so basically, I just kind of collapsed through the holidays. And you know how it is. Somehow December becomes January. And January lasts a decade and yet somehow also seems to transition instantly into February. And then I'm still not sure where March came from. It just happened, and meanwhile I was still mentally somewhere back in the first week of January...? 

And now somehow suddenly we're all fighting a virus and also halfway waiting to turn into zombies. The world is nuts.

Tough Goodbyes

(DAMMIT)

It didn't help that I was also still processing the unexpected loss of a beloved pet, my cat Frodo (look at that face) not long before, and I'd kind of put off dealing with it at the time, so it hit me extra hard over the holidays. If you've ever lost a beloved pet, you know what it's like, and while I've been a pet owner for my entire adult life, and loved and grieved every single furkid that I've ever had to lose (RIP Samwise, Pippin, Sagan, Hermione)—always far too soon—losing Frodo honestly knocked the wind out of me. 

I'd had Frodo since his first day on earth (I rescued him and sweet littermate Batty (and two adorable others my family adopted, complete with bottle-feeding), and he was scruffy but cute in a brindled-stray kind of way. His sibling Batty, for instance, was a silver slip of a kitty, elegant and sleek, with a long-nosed face and almond eyes that still transfix anyone she meets (as they should! She's gorgeous and utterly precious). But Fro really wasn't visually distinctive. He was goofy and plump. He had a big pink nose with a long white bridge. And one funny, long white sock on his right paw. That was it. He was a basic tomcat. 

Until you got to know him. When he became this weird, wonderful, individual, goofy, ridiculously affectionate cat—a real individual, and an incredibly hilarious, vocal and loving feline who spent his life lying on my lap, shoulder, keyboard, or bed (with inseparable Batty), as close to me as possible, 20 out of every 24 hours, for 13 years (when he wasn't chewing laptop cords, knocking over water glasses, or chewing on toilet paper rolls as his go-to's for amusement). I used to joke to friends that with Frodo's demand for closeness, the only thing that would make him truly happy was for me to swallow him whole, at which point, he'd go, "FINALLY!" He was just always connected to me by that invisible umbilical. And vice versa. There's nothing like rescuing an animal as a baby to increase your vulnerability to them, and even then, Frodo was unique.

For instance, even his mild seizure disorder just seemed like part of his quirk and difference, and he handled it lifelong with a curious patience and dignity. After his diagnosis, I kept a big, dog-sized, hard-shelled kennel to shelter Frodo for those rare moments involving a larger seizure, and he never fought against being locked away, but was instead so inured to his 'special area' (one I kept cozy and inviting, with warm blankets sprinkled with catnip) that he would often go into the kennel the moment he felt a seizure approaching. It was peculiarly sweet, and humbling, to watch.

Frodo Doodle courtesy of my talented friend Sheha
of  AdoribullAddicts

Then Frodo was unexpectedly diagnosed with an inoperable bladder tumor in late October, so it was one of those rare situations where all is fine with your beloved pet, then suddenly five days later, you're $5k further in debt and (worse) having to schedule to have your furry friend euthanized. Which I did at home, and which, in hindsight, I felt was harder on me as his owner in some ways (it takes a lot longer than it does at the vet), but which was also incredibly comforting and stress-free for my sweet little guy, so it was the right thing to do. 

Thanks to a caring vet house call, and to my sister Laura's constant support at every step (she called the vet every 8 hours while Frodo was there), I was able to do the right thing. The vet even fell for my ridiculous sweet Fro, looking at me with an openly stricken face as Frodo, mildly buzzed and pain-free on meds, rolled over under her fingers for more snuggles and belly-rubs on introduction; her face was an open depiction of Oh shit, I have to put him to sleep. But she was a terrific help, and my poor Frodo died in my arms, purring to the end—and the very last thing he did was to raise his head to rub his cheek against mine. And then he just kept on sleeping.

I still hate Wednesday mornings, ever since. Wednesday mornings are still, to me, that time when I had to bring someone in to send Frodo away.

Frodo (left) and his sweet tiny Batty (littermate and
protector, right). My two buddies, now one shy...

Anyway. I wasn't okay for awhile after that, and worst of all, a lot of the world just doesn't understand how much those losses can hurt, so it's something a lot of pet owners have to go through alone (I am lucky to have friends and family who do understand, but it still hasn't been easy). 

My reaction really humbled me... it reminded me again of how much we take for granted, and I was reminded yet again of the revelation I'd had after nursing my stepdad and Mom through terminal illnesss... of how lucky we are every single day simply when nothing goes wrong. When everyone we love is safe, and present. It's a gift, and it's finite. Something will always go wrong. That's life. Our job is to enjoy everyone and everything while we can.

Portrait of Frodo and Batty (Frodo top,
Batty below) Thanks Mithmeoi!

But I'm lucky, still, in many ways... lucky to have my little silver Batty, Fro's equally adored littermate with me, who also had to grieve her loss and confusion in her own way. Hearing my little surviving cat walk around making eerie little sorrowful awooo howls, or talking to her reflection in the mirror (in brand-new behavior, as if searching for her brother), was brutal, so I took care of her and she gave me a ton of cuddles, and we got through that incredibly sucky period together. 

It's life. We assimilate and move on. There will always be a breach, a rift, a demon... a death. We manage it, right? That's the world. But we are so, so lucky for everything in between.

A Moment for Thanks...

Anyway. I just wanted to let you know that this blog means a lot to me, and so do all of you who read it and share your reactions with me. The Dragon Age community has made me feel so accepted and welcomed, while also celebrating with me when I was up, and cheering me when I was down. You are all magic.

I do have several additional posts in progress that I can't wait to share with you (including the fabulous third and fourth parts of my transcribed interview with the wonderful Weekeses, criminally past-due!). I'm also planning on a progression to my Solas romance analysis series, as well as some individual posts examining stories in the exciting new Tevinter Nights short story compilation just out this past month!

So—I just wanted to send out a brief apology, with my heartfelt thanks for your patience, and I'll look forward to your reactions to my upcoming posts, which I hope will help to make up for the silence.

Meanwhile, the world seems to just get crazier every day. In spite of that, please know you're not alone. Stay safe out there, rest up, stay healthy, and take care of yourselves.

Ma serannas, and ar lath ma... (but not in a creepy way)...

Angela

All Things Considered... I'd Rather Be in Thedas

Just a short personal post to apologize for the lags in posting, and to admit that I would have probably welcomed joining the Grey Wardens to what my actual Summer included...

Unless I'm transcribing my embarrassing past phone conversations  with friends about Dragon Age characters, I don't usually talk much here about my actual real life. Mostly because this blog is meant to entertain you, not to depress and befuddle you as I navigate the perplexing but mostly boring minefield of my weird, anxiety-ridden  misfit existence, which is mostly punctuated by show tunes, fan art, book quotes, bad poems, and cats.

 And also, because, well, we're here to talk about Dragon Age, darn it, where we all mentally reside at magnificent Skyhold, live bravely, fight superbly, heal magically, drink copiously, and there's always someone around who's dying to date you.

However, I do want to apologize for my absence this past month or so from the blog, as well as from my fanfic postings, for those who follow those. So just a quick overview.

It started in late May. I'd already been mourning the sudden death of a friend, then had some unusual hurdles arise in my freelancing life (which is usually pretty stable), thanks to a few corporate clients who broke contract (two in a single week) when faced with sudden economic downturns unrelated to their PR (which was going fabulously)—events that unfortunately echoed across the rest of my summer. By July, I was also alarmingly not able to access my healthcare benefits or their status, my cat Frodo's formerly mild seizure condition worsened, and my stress level increased to the point that I was constantly sick and began to experience exhaustion, GI issues, and chest pain alarming enough to put me in the hospital (apologizing profusely of course to everyone from the doctors to the nurses to the technicians), certain I was having a heart attack and that I was seriously ill.

My Frodo does not want to go to Mordor.
He just wants chin scritches.

Luckily, I lived (I love pleasant surprises!), and I even discovered that I was relatively healthy, so things were temporarily looking up! 

Then 5 days later, one of my two main hard drives failed and I promptly lost 4 terabytes of data... that did not show up on any of my (four!) external hard drives... or on those two paid cloud accounts. I didn't lose work, PR or freelancing product—those backups were successful. However, I did lose a few vital folders directly relating to my fiction in 2019, from my novels, plays and lyrics, to this blog, to my fanfiction (pretty devastating, since that Dragon Age novel The Breakers and the Broken was almost done), and to new works in progress. I'm still working with this, although the drive will be going to data recovery soon, so fingers crossed. But it was a pretty devastating blow.

The drama continued as August arrived (and my credit card bills swelled)... my cat Frodo's seizures reached a point where he needed home vet visits, new tests, exams and new meds, all of which were hugely expensive... Unfortunately, instead of resolving his issues, Frodo did not respond well to the new medication, and instead he required 24-hour monitoring from me for falls and symptoms during acclimation, plus enduring four really scary near-death experiences over the ensuing past three weeks. Luckily, he had his littermate Batty to cuddle him as well, so he had lots of care.

But... it's been interesting.

Frodo being cared for by (and lying on) his little littermate Batty, who cares
for him when he has seizures.

The good news is that I'm still here, I've rallied my life and my inspiration and goals, and I'm excited for Fall, and for rebuilding and recovering what I can. Frodo is also much better, and he has acclimated to the medication to the extent that he is much more stable, he's only slightly unsteady, and he's completely back to his funny affectionate self.

But enough real life—we're here to talk about Thedas! Just know that I really appreciate each one of you reading right now, as well as a special few who have put up with my rants, impatience, and bad temper this Summer in our work together, so sending much love and special thanks on this front to Teresa, Julie, Kimberley, Sheha, Liz, Kenna, Stef, Virpi, Nerine, Paul W., Malus, Terrabye, Snark Knight, Anjelica, Lily, Jo, Kim, Cat, Amy, Savvy, Essem, Andrastini, Calwyne, AutographedCat, Iolanthe, Bill, and so many others.

And this also goes for you special folks who have championed and followed me on Twitter, who have supported me on Ko-Fi and Patreon, and who have been patient with the temporary delay in my fanfiction postings on Archive of Our Own. So many times, this summer, when I was tired, sick, sad or frustrated, you and the others in the Dragon Age community were there to provide encouragement and kindness, and I'll never be able to express what that has meant to me. You are all starstuff and I assume you also smell like elfroot (which I headcanon is minty and fresh and magical, like athelas, and which, I'm assuming, is the best scent in the world).

Doodle by Sheha of @AdoribullAddicts

So I hope you'll accept this heartfelt ma serannas for your patience and support! I appreciate you all. I hope your Summers were better than mine... and I look forward to continuing to be inspired by you this Fall.

You have already inspired me, and it means the world.

Of Lore Traps and Stewed Nugs (May Update on Posts & Lore in Progress...)

COLE: We share the ancient mysteries, the feelings lost, forgotten dreams, unseen for ages, now beheld in wonder.

Hello, all you beautiful readers!

Thank you so much for your patience, those of you who follow and read my blog and social media posts. I'm so grateful, and first off, I want to send a thank-you to those of you who read my stuff, as well as those who may still be new to following me or my blog—thank you for reading!

However, as it's obvious that I've been a little slower than usual this past month or two, I wanted to share my situation... 

In a nutshell? The lore keeps tripping me up. In the best way. 

I fall into it, basically.

For instance, I have some exciting lore explorations in progress that I truly think are going to be really fun and worth the research, but the problem is... I've kept falling into those freaking lore traps. Each new fun question or exploration recently has led to a new issue for me to explore first, and each one of those turned out to be a doozy. 

And that's a good thing, not a bad thing, but it is frustrating and inconvenient. I'm used to spending a few weeks per post, but the latest have involved weeks of careful diagrams, notes, playthrough footage review, and more.

It slows me down. After all, I can't explore the tip of the pyramid if I don't explore the foundation, right?

So here we are.

The Innocent Hell of Wondering Where People Sleep

Here's a great example...

I had this fun idea to explore, see, based on some discussions I saw a long time ago, on "Where They Sleep," both at Haven and Skyhold, in Inquisition. This was such a fun, charming idea! What could be wrong with me exploring where all our favorite companions and advisors lay their heads, right? So I started research. 

And please note, this was NOT an original idea, and I will be crediting the original posters on the inspiration (and linking to them) as best I can, as always.

But, see, then I realized that nothing I posted would make sense without context. I could post where Cullen sleeps at Haven, or Skyhold, but then I might as well really do it right, also hypothesizing where Bull slept, or Cass. And what about Dorian? Does he actually sleep in the library at Skyhold? Come on! Of course he doesn't. Dorian would demand only the best. 

Diving into the Lore

And so, I began to ask questions. I was intrigued and frustrated. As my research progressed, I soon realized that it would not be a simple "fun" post after all (none of them). Because, with Dragon Age, lore rules over all. 

And so I became aware of a mountain of work ahead of me if I wanted to complete that exploration.

In other words... 

• I needed to completely map Skyhold
• I needed to do so from dungeon/basement to floors 1, 2, and 3 (and walk all battlements, noting all tent areas, towers, abandoned spaces, etc.)
• I needed to note all sleeping areas and workrooms
• I needed to, well, note everything

And then I did this, as best I could, and I was really happy with it, even if I kept moving Cole and Sera in a completely paranoid fashion, first by floors then by which side of the Herald's Rest they were on (sorry!). I mean, it was bad. I think I moved them six times. Sorry. I just kept second-guessing myself!

Also, I have no sense of direction. Which means that the idea of ME making a map of any kind is HILARIOUS. I mean, seriously. If someone had given me a spool of thread (like Varric did Merrill) I'd still be using it to get around this world. I sometimes get lost on my own block and have to look downhill to make sure I'm heading back home.

Yes, it's embarrassing. But it was a fun challenge, and the best part was... I would finally know my way around Skyhold instead of my usual approach of opening doors and feeling pleased when the rooms beyond were the ones I'd wanted to get to.

Mapping Skyhold

So it actually happened—I mapped Skyhold (wine cellar and all) and it felt terrific, like something tangible. (Of course, in updating the map for the sixth time while writing this, the entire post became corrupted, disappeared, and I had to rebuild it from scratch. It's been that kind of week.)

Regardless, then I (FINALLY!) moved forward with "Where They Sleep." 

Only to realize, yet again, for context, that I really might as well go ahead and completely map Haven. 

Again, as with Skyhold, emphasis on "Completely." Sigh.

But come on. If I'm gonna do this, why not do it right? If I'm gonna tell you where Cullen's tent is, why don't I tell you where EVERYTHING is?

I am a Terrible Blogger

So that's the scoop.

And... yeah. So now I've been working on completely mapping Haven, and where to find everyone, and where they sleep, and just... well, everything. And here we are. I'm finishing my Haven map, and I think it will be a real resource (as I hope will the Skyhold one) in perpetuity, for fans who may need the extra help.

Like all lore stuff, though, it's just proven to be more work than expected.

And I appreciate your patience. See, here's the thing: I love talking about what Solas wants or what Cole dreams or what Bull hides or what Anders survives, but I also want to make sure I'm offering more than just frilly word-cakes here. 

I want to provide insights you guys can actually use to play and enhance your gameplay and enjoyment of Dragon Age across the trilogy. I really want to balance that stuff with the lore, so that, yes, you can learn about Solas or Cole or Varric or Anders here, but I also want you to be able to reference questions you might have, about where people sleep or about where everything is at Skyhold, or what Solas's frescoes mean, or what was happening in that chess match, or whether Sera hides secrets of her own, and more.

And don't even get me started on the months of research and analysis I've spent on all the character Tarot card symbolism character by character, or on dissecting the Chant of Light. Or on the Evanuris, the Fade, the nature of the Titans, etc. I've attempted some rudimentary examinations, but there is always so much more to learn! So those are posts in progress right now, as well as character analyses of Varric, Dorian, Scout Harding, and of Solas and Bull's loyalty quests.

I also have some fun, short silly exercises I'll be sharing shortly as well, to break up all the heavier lore stuff. (So be afraid, be very afraid...)

Coming Soon...

So apologies, and thanks for bearing with me! I hate being silent, and appreciate your patience more than I can say.

If it helps, I also have some big book-length Dumped, Drunk & Dalish projects in the works for publication, and am going to be insanely excited to be able to share those next steps with you in the weeks to come. There have just been some legalities for me to solidify first, so that I've made sure that whatever I create (nonfiction analyses and critiques like those you see here, no fiction elements) is okay with BioWare and legal to publish.

Meanwhile, thank you for reading, and thank you for bearing with me. And a special thank-you to those who support me on Patreon and Ko-Fi! I so appreciate you, and I hope you'll find the additional upcoming content worth the wait.

Ma serannas, lethallen!