The Blows of the Chisel: Your Place in the Qun (Asit tal-eb, Part 1)

Under the Qun, individual identity is immaterial. It's only valued for its contribution to the whole. Above, the Qunari warriors could (at least) console themselves that they are now artistic and exciting additions to Solas's garden. Woo-hoo!

THE IRON BULL: It's like being a block of stone with a sculptor working on you. One day, the last of the crap gets knocked off, and you can see your real shape, what you're supposed to be.

Shok ebasit hissra. Meraad astaarit, meraad itwasit, aban aqun. Maraas shokra. Anaan esaam Qun. "Struggle is an illusion. The tide rises, the tide falls, but the sea is changeless. There is nothing to struggle against. Victory is in the Qun."
—QUNARI TENET

Shanedan, intrepid Thedosians! So... as always, I started to write one column and analysis, aaaaand... found myself falling down the rabbit hole.

It's Dragon Age, right? It's easy to do. After all, this entire blog is, to some extent, my fall down that very same rabbit hole.

But this was a pretty big tangent, so just a note of explanation.

See, I started my post by writing about Bull's pivotal loyalty quest in Dragon Age: Inquisition, "The Demands of the Qun." But as I began to write my analysis, I realized that I needed to preface that post, to lay a kind of foundation. Before I talked about the demands of the Qun... and what they would ask of Bull... shouldn't I take a look at the Qun itself, and what it demands of its adherents? Shouldn't I place that quest in some sort of context? After all, what does it matter that Bull must meet the Qun's demands, unless we have a better idea of what those demands actually are?

Besides, not gonna lie... it's really fascinating to go back and look at the Qun across the trilogy.

So here we are. First off, I'm going to post this overview of the Qun, and what I think it asks of those who follow it, as well as how it's presented across the Dragon Age trilogy.

After that, I'll also be posting some interesting revelations and revisits with my darling Sten, as well as transcriptions with my equally adored yet (yes) terrifying Arishok, including several dialogues I transcribed from Dragon Age II.

And then we'll get to "The Demands of the Qun." Eventually.

"Struggle is an Illusion"

Ever since Dragon Age: Origins, I've always been fascinated by the Qun... and more than a little terrified by it.

Any belief system that requires participants to act only for the big picture, an inherently Fascist doctrine, and utterly disregarding the individual... should terrify anyone. It does me.

And this is life under the Qun, where people act in support of their world order, without care for individual harm, loss or effect. Under the Qun, the individual identity is immaterial and utterly without merit. It is only valued for its contribution to the whole.

What I love about the progression of its presentation across Dragon Age is how each Qunari character presents a new and more complex, different aspect of understanding the Qun:

Sten, Dragon Age: Origins: As the true believer, Sten is the perfect introduction to the Qun philosophy and societal construct. Sten is the soldier, the steadfast subscriber, and the perfect introduction to Qun 101. The Qun is who he is. Sten only falls apart, notably, when he has lost that identity (via the loss of his sword).

Sten has no quandaries about his identity or his place, and finds the outer world deeply troubling and confusing. Although he is charmed by a few little indulgences (kittens, flowers, paintings, and cookies), Sten ends his adventures relatively unchanged. He ends as he began, viewing all outside points of view as counterproductive and alien to the Qun. He will return to his people, mission accomplished, unchanged (but not unaffected).

The Arishok, Dragon Age II: Enter the Arishok. As one of the three main rulers within the Qun's world, the Arishok provides a much bigger, starker view of what the Qun demands—essentially a flipped view from that of ordinary soldier Sten. And yet, like Sten, the Arishok's focus is rigid, narrow, and as confined as his quarters in that Kirkwall alley. He's genuinely scary (and so hot! OH SHUT UP) because he's not simply a tyrant or conqueror. He's desperate, trapped, and trying to recover the single most important artifact of his people across the ages. While tempted to intervene many times in what he sees as a disturbing and decadent chaos, he sits out the conflicts in Kirkwall for several years before breaking and deciding to "save" its inhabitants violently for the Qun. It does not end well for anyone. And no, I'm still not okay.

Tallis, Dragon Age II: Mark of the Assassin (DLC): Played by criminally charming geek goddess Felicia Day, Tallis is a lovable yet deadly agent of the Ben-Hassrath seeking simply to fulfill a mission that involves both love and loyalty. While I felt this mission slightly simplified both the Qun and especially the Ben-Hassrath, casting them in a rosier glow than they perhaps deserve, I enjoyed it as an up-close vision of a person simply trying to do the right thing under its regime. From the extremes of Sten and the Arishok, Tallis is a welcome middle-ground character.

The Iron Bull, Dragon Age: Inquisition: The Iron Bull is a wonderful culmination of Qun-loyal characters, because he exists in both realities when it comes to the Qun. He's in, he's out. He's loyal, he's Ben-Hassrath. No matter what you choose as a player, as a spy and sleeper agent, Bull is deeply entrenched in both the worlds of the Ben-Hassrath and Inquisition, and he acts accordingly. Whether we earn his loyalty or don't, whether we romance him or don't... we inevitably learn volumes about the Qun thanks to Bull, and in a truly unique new way.

And for all his bluff, for all his inner questions, Bull's still a true believer when we meet him. Which is why I find his C.S. Lewis simile about the blows of the chisel so affecting (and about which I will have much more to say in a later post)—he wants to be carved. He wants to be shaped. He is fully willing to be altered, repaired, moved, sculpted... to meet the challenges asked of him. And the outcome of his story, depending on our choices, is both personal and devastating in "Trespasser." 

What the Qun Demands

As a world order, the Qun is undeniably pretty scary.

And yet, I can also understand those I know who find the fantasy of the Qun oddly comforting. The structure, the knowledge of your own place in the larger picture. The immutable changelessness of it. As one friend put it, "You'd never have to worry about your own safety. You'd never worry about hunger, or shelter, or abuse, or unemployment. You'd be treated with inherent respect by everyone in your society no matter what your role. And you'd know your life had purpose."

I get this. But of course I also have to always counter this point of view by naming the price for this safety: An absolute lack of personal agency (which is probably the one thing that scares me more than anything in the world). Under the Qun, you'd be safe, sure:

• But your body will not belong to you.
• You will do what you're told.
• You will be analyzed from babyhood and assigned for maximum usefulness. If this occurs, you may be trained in warfare, spycraft and more, while still in childhood.
• You will perform the job you are given efficiently... whether you enjoy it or not.
• You will go where you're sent.
• You will not marry or partner with a romantic interest.
• You will have sexual relations with whoever you are commanded to mate with for breeding purposes.
• You will then be required to give birth, if female, to any resulting child.
• If you do give birth, your child will be taken away to be raised in a group setting by a Tamassran, indoctrinated in groupthink before it cuts its first tooth or grows its first little stubs of horns.
• Your primary social relationships will be with those you work with (no mates, lovers, family units allowed).
• You will agree to reeducation and brainwashing if you ask too many questions, or if you show yourself to be mentally fragile.
• If you manifest magical abilities, you will submit to being leashed, enslaved, your tongue may be removed, and your mouth may be sewn shut.
• If you become unable to do your current job, you may be put to work in menial labor until you are no longer physically functional... and then executed.

I mean, holy totalitarianism, Batman. That's a heavy price for safety.

The Qun accepts everyone. That's great. Except that it then demands everything they are, everything they have, everything they dream or want or desire.

Chaos Into Order

As an important and complex aspect of Thedas's diverse assortment of belief systems—as well as the code that has driven the Qunari characters we have met and cared for over the past three games—the Qun is a wonderful fictional construct. Its primary inventors (as far as I know—please correct me if I'm inaccurate here) in the BioWare creative Qunari triumvirate seem to have included resident Qun expert Mary Kirby (who wrote Sten in DAO, and laid the foundation), and with additional insight and expansion by David Gaider in DAO, and further in DA2 with Kirby, as well as by Patrick Weekes in Dragon Age: Inquisition as he wrote for The Iron Bull.

The Qun, to me, as noted, seems to combine multiple potential philosophies and belief systems, but it's important to call out the fact that while it seems restrictive and confining, everyone is welcome. This is vital, scary, and (well) effective for recruitment and public relations. It's especially attractive, I would imagine, for many elves, who are still seeking for identity and a larger meaning. Anyone of any race can join, anyone can become viddathari and in fact ascend in the hierarchy to significant degrees, as they prove their worth.

This is all part of the important bigger picture: There is no deity to the Qun. While the Qun seems at first glance to be religious in nature, I think that's kind of a metaphysical feint; I think it's really not at all religious, and that belief in anything higher would in fact be antithetical to the Qun itself. So to me, ultimately, it's areligious—more philosophical and fatalistic, more authoritarian and political. There's a lot more of Confucius and Communism than Christ to the Qun, after all.

And as a code of conduct and series of rules for daily life, the Qun is basically a belief system that creates a perfect totalitarian melting pot of societal entrapment.

The Tome of Koslun

The Qun seemed to start harmlessly enough, and with peaceful intent. Based upon the writings of Kossith philosopher Ashkaari (Qunlat for "One who seeks") Koslun, in the beginning it appeared to be a code created, at its most basic, to operate out of the desire to soothe the inner savage lurking in every Kossith. Koslun yearns for order, and his teachings reflect a belief that structure is the only possible rational response to chaos, whether internal or external.

His writings therefore counsel and soothe, offering not so much a code for peace, as for order, as a potential antithesis to the savagery that slept in the heart of every one of his brethren, who were rechristened as "the Qunari," i.e., "the People of the Qun."

This origin certainly lends credence to Bull's fears of a loss of control, of his inner savage, and to his stories of other Tal-Vashoth as beings who had gone brutal and cruel, without boundary or logic. Under the teachings of Koslun, there's real belief in the potential violence in the hearts of these magnificent horned giants. Is it something to do with their mysterious origins? Were they engineered, after all, long ago, perhaps by the Evanuris themselves? Is that inner savagery due to their dreams of dragon blood and kinship? 

Why do the Qunari fear their inner capacity for violence above all else? Why is a self-administered system of suffocation and entrapment the only answer?

It's a good question. One I suspect has still not been entirely answered. Yet.

Oh, Izzy. Stealing treasures and wreaking havoc and not really calculating outcomes...

The World and Self are One

Koslun wrote all his observations and tenets down, painstakingly and in great and poetic detail, in a volume that became known as The Tome of Koslun. The book became the single most revered relic among the Qunari, was lost during the Qunari Wars, and eventually was locked away in Orlais until 9:31 Dragon, when it was stolen by Isabela.

I wish I'd understood when playing DA2 how absolutely staggering the scope of Isabela's deed was here. We're talking about pretty much the only sacred artifact the Qunari possess. And she stole it. Of course, on the plus side, this also makes DA2 incredible fun to revisit, as well as the Omnibus, where we get a poignant glimpse of what exactly Isabela suffered, and why she pursued her revenge in that way.

And after all those revelations, I definitely get why. Izzy was forced into marriage, abused, traumatized, and basically enslaved, and the Qunari chapter of her life was a big part of that. But looking back, I still wince at what she chose to do here, not just because it affected thousands (and potentially tens of thousands) of innocent lives in Kirkwall, but because she was willing to up-end the Qunari people's one single artifact. Surely there were other things to steal? Easier things? 

Still, it's not like she was going to do something small to make a statement. That wouldn't be true to Isabela on any level. 

"Esit Tal-eb."

Regardless, the Qunari got their relic back, one way or another, depending on your decisions in Dragon Age II. And the teachings of Koslun remained a continued reminder to seek inner peace, and to accept what cannot be changed:

When the Ashkaari looked upon the destruction wrought by locusts,

He saw at last the order in the world.

A plague must cause suffering for as long as it endures,

Earthquakes must shatter the land.

They are bound by their being.

Asit tal-eb. It is to be.

For the world and the self are one.

Existence is a choice.

A self of suffering, brings only suffering to the world.

It is a choice, and we can refuse it.

—An excerpt from The Qun, Canto 4

I find this both disturbing and comforting. The ability to accept the world as it is, to stop fighting the tide and to flow with it instead, can certainly be viewed as reassuring on some levels. But, all words aside, suffering isn't truly a choice is it? It is something we endure. And suffering is, for most of us, transitory. Temporary. Life is not usually a series of extremes. We all muddle through somewhere in the middle, after all. Suffering is just a part of the deal.

But—still—I get why adages like these might be attractive for those seeking to find meaning in life, and who turn to the Qun for support. Because this hearkens right back to the comfort I brought up earlier. Under the Qun, we need not question who we are, what our purpose is, right? We wouldn't need to wonder why we exist. What our suffering is worth. The Qun provides persuasive answers to that, even if in most cases, those answers would be pretty suppressive.

A Search for Peace

It's pretty apparent that Koslun wasn't a bad guy. There is a beautiful balance to his idea that the only answer to chaos is order. I don't think it's terribly practical or enforceable in the long term, however. Is the only answer to a wildfire a determination to stomp out all fire in perpetuity? It just seems a little extreme.

Still, so Ashkaari believed. And so the Qun was realized and brought into the world.

The result was a mighty fantastical regime powerfully reminiscent of real-world regimes like those of the Soviet Union, the Nazis, and North Korea (as well as with a smattering of Imperialist China due to the presence of gunpowder and "gaatlok" explosives). 

The Qun operates like a smooth, well-oiled machine... as long as all the components stay components. As long as everyone remembers their place. As long as everyone acts for the greater good. As long as nobody sticks out too much. As long as square pegs contort themselves into round holes. And of course, with a distrust of magic, and with a deep distrust for demons, spirits, and magical entities of all kinds, which is understandable in a culture where reality and nature are revered above what cannot be seen.

There is no you under the Qun. There is no individual Sten. Or Bull. Or... anyone... under the Qun. The individual is immaterial. And yet the system does offer that connection, to something that is not exactly divine, but which is simply more. The Qun asks you to serve something larger than yourself. And to reach inward, with your inner eye, to become your truest, best self. The Qun's core tenet is to ask people and objects alike to simply be what they are, to display their wonder and difference in the light of the sun.

I think of Gatt a lot here. Imagine being abused, terrified, enslaved, and then being rescued. Imagine being avenged, finding acceptance and friendship, and as you learn of your new society, imagine discovering genuine interest, support, and comfort from the Qunari. Imagine seeking a destiny supported by your rescuers, the reinforcement that you are essential. Imagine finding your place—not as a slave, not as as reviled elf, but as a man. And in doing so, finding even greater service and connection under the Qun.

It's why I can't blame Gatt, ever. Gatt's just trying to survive. And to honor those who saved him.

As of Dragon Age: Inquisition, the Qun ebbs and flows like a tide across Thedas, gaining and losing sands but always maintaining a calm and terribly certain center.

Under the Qun's Eye

As of Dragon Age: Inquisition, the Qun can be argued to be at its height. It is an empire that ebbs and flows like a tide across Thedas, gaining and losing sands but always maintaining a calm and terribly certain center. And it does so without the stigma of magic (or blood magic) or obvious enslavement practiced by Tevinter. I can see how this would be attractive to those who maybe don't look too close. Or who are so desperate for peace, for answers, that any order is better than chaos.

After all, the Qunari are patient teachers. If you're conquered, it's true that they don't see you as an actual person... but hey, they really do hope you'll convert, so that they can finally see you as one.

And that's where we are as of DAI and "Trespasser." As Sten predicted, there is every sign that the Qunari are seeking to expand their scope, their areas of conquest, their impetus to "help" Thedas and compel order. They are poised, at long last, to arrive on our shores... even as Solas assembles his own army and matures his plans.

And this is what I fully expect to be the reality of Dragon Age 4.

The Future of the Qun in Dragon Age

After Blights, after Rifts and demons and magical warfare... the Qun may come across to many as comforting. Safe. After all, as its formidable warriors carve their paths across Thedas, the Qun is a belief system that does not ask people to follow gods or deities or supernatural beings. Instead, and persuasively, it asks them to seek an inner sense of order and calmness. It argues, in fact, that if you cannot find that inner peace... the Qun will provide it.

The Qun does not require that you believe in the Maker. In the elven pantheon or the Evanuris. It simply asks you to be your best self. And to put all effort of that self into the vision of something larger. If you do so, you are complimented because you are a person, not a thing. You are a respectable being. Not a bas, a nonperson, a sub-person, a thing. You are special. You are, in fact, never alone, because you are a part of something greater:

Solitude is illusion. Alone in the darkness,

I was surrounded on all sides.

The starlight dripped from the petals

Of cactus flowers,

A chorus of insects sang across the dunes.

How much abundance the world carries

If every fistful of sand

Is an eternity of mountains.

—An excerpt from The Qun, The Body Canto

Hey. It's persuasive stuff. It's why people join cults. It's why Bull glories in the suffering he endures under the Qun, secure in the idea that these are the blows of the chisel, each one improving him, revealing his true form and bringing him closer to perfection.

I think it's human (and nonhuman) nature to seek acceptance. To see comfort, and safety, and structure. The Qun offers a seductive option for many people that I actually think would be surprisingly popular today, both legislatively and socially. Which is why, next game... if the elves aren't choosing Solas, I'm betting they'll be heading to the Qun in greater numbers than ever before.

At its core, the Qun scares me. It's repugnant to me. I can't help but believe, much like Solas, that free will is essential for society. I also think this is deliberately built into the idea of the Qun and its place in the Dragon Age saga. Yes, it's powerful, fascinating, even seductive. But it can't survive. Ultimately, the demands of the Qun are unsustainable. As context, I can understand someone moving to another country and finding its laws and ethics more to their liking, especially in the world we find today. I can understand people choosing cultures and climates that work for them. What I cannot quite get is the idea of choosing a belief system in which unbelievers are no longer people. 

But of course we see it now, every day, in the real world, right this very moment. That compartmentalization of people into two groups: Those who matter. And those who do not.

So it's brilliant and timely, certainly, that we explore that divide here in the fictional setting Thedas provides across the massive Dragon Age trilogy, novels, and graphic novels—not just via the Qun, but with the Chantry. With the conflicts between templars and mages. With the dissolution of the Seekers. With the desperate destruction of Anders. And with Solas, too.

Nothing is worth a universe in which life is valued only for a precious few. Which is why the Qun cannot live indefinitely. People aren't automatons. We can serve greater ideas, but not without appreciation for our separate, individual lives and selves. 

The Qun will always be doomed to fail. In the end, the individual cannot be ignored.

We are not things.

The Lies of the Qun (My Case for Bull as an Unreliable Narrator)

The Iron Bull is perceptive and intelligent, one of the most keenly aware and complex characters in Dragon Age. But what if his choices make him an unreliable narrator?

SOLAS: The mind does marvelous things to protect itself.

Hello, there! I've been working on a series of posts about The Iron Bull's arc that will culminate in an in-depth analysis of Bull's pivotal loyalty quest "The Demands of the Qun" very shortly. It's been a long time in the works and may actually break my current record for post length (WALLS OF TEXT! OH, SO MANY, MANY WALLS OF TEXT!).

But in the meantime... before we do, let's pause for a second... and rewind. Because those demands of the Qun may be even more insidious, embedded, and complicated than we knew.

While researching the Qunari and transcribing "Demands of the Qun," I've been thinking about Bull and his story arc a lot lately, and it occurred to me that by Bull's own admission, he's not a reliable narrator when it comes to some of the events he relates to us. I am, after all, talking about a guy who openly tells us that he cheerfully and happily turned himself in for brainwashing a decade or so back. And still finds nothing wrong with that. If anything, he seems to find it comforting.

This means that there are comments and banters and stories involving Bull that I think may deserve closer examination before we plunge him into the terrible choices of his pivotal loyalty quest, so let's take a look at those before we meet Gatt and the Chargers on that faraway rainy cliffside.

So come along with me, won't you? Let's pause and look back...

One of Bull's most frequent arguments as he defends the Qun is that Tal-Vashoth are savage, and that the Qun is the only thing keeping them under control. What if this is simply an implanted awareness, versus a result of true observation?

Reeducating Bull

As the storyline and companionships of Dragon Age: Inquisition progress, one of Bull's most frequent arguments with Solas as he defends the Qun is that Tal-Vashoth are savage and inherently dangerous, and that the Qun is the only thing keeping them civilized and under control. Bull openly and fully subscribes to the idea that there is a beast within him and within all Qunari that's always straining to break free, moments from appearance, and I find this really interesting and actually more than a little paradoxical.

Let me explain.

Bull is, after all, one of the characters within the DAI story who appears, at least to me, to be not just under his own constant and assured control, but to a pretty finely honed, even extraordinary degree. Bull often implies that he's almost able to regulate his own biological systems, at least insofar as they register outwardly. He's able to read people down to the micro-expression, he's a flawless actor in his own right, and he's been taught how to observe, use and manipulate people socially and even sexually for decades.

So... why is Bull so scared of "going savage?" He's a freaking superhero of Qunari spydom! He's capable of being as cold and still as the moment requires.

And yet... he is genuinely afraid of that loss of control. Palpably so. So it's no surprise that he's also preoccupied with demonic possession, or that his greatest fear is insanity. And the bummer is, I think most of this has been instilled, manufactured, and exacerbated... by the Qun.

Because, truth is, ultimately, Bull's prejudices all benefit the Qun. So it's no surprise that they might mess with those, a bit. So there's a difference between what Bull perceives and what's actually happening, and me, well, I think it's a combination of factors that include, unfortunately, the reeducators. 

The fucking reeducators.

To become Tal-Vashoth is the worst and most shameful fate for any Qunari, who can at that point only hope for a quick death or endless reeducation and submission (or qamek and death as a mindless laborer).

The "Others"

Let's face it, it is all to the interests of the Qun that Tal-Vashoth be seen as raging demons, outsiders, and savages. Which is why I believe that not only are those within the Qunari raised with this point of view and live within its propaganda constantly, but I also believe the reeducators reinforce this with actual brainwashing whenever given the opportunity.

If the Tal-Vashoth are actually not feral, unhinged monsters, and are rather just people who chose to leave the Qun, then this also means that of course the Qunari are in constant danger of a neverending sloughing off of people, strength, numbers, labor and talent. So instead they demonize the defectors—and provide an even more insistent reason for killing them: That they are animals, monsters, savages. They are defined within the classic "other" language used since the dawn of time. 

And presto! With a few choice adjectives, some propaganda, and a little savvy brainwashing, the Tal-Vashoth are no longer heroic rebels fighting for individuality and choice. Instead, they become monstrous; mindless arbiters of violence and fear. And according to this propaganda, of course, to become one is the worst and most shameful fate for any Qunari, who can at that point only hope for a quick death or endless reeducation and submission (or qamek and death as a mindless laborer).

Sten's a scary reminder of the Qun's devastating simplicity: "They knew me before I was born. I was birthed on the day they chose. Placed into the world by their hands. When I die, it will be the tamassrans who note my passing. I am their work."

"It Was Theirs to Begin With..."

Keep in mind, this is all ethical not only to the Qun's ruling triumvirate, it's openly espoused and supported by its people themselves, like Bull, or (hearkening back to DAO) Sten, who in one of the most telling banters in the game, reveals to the Warden how deeply the Qun truly owns him, body and soul:

WARDEN: Why do you let the tamassrans control your life?
STEN: What makes it mine? It was theirs to begin with.
WARDEN: What does that mean?
STEN: They knew me before I was born. I was birthed on the day they chose. Placed into the world by their hands. When I die, it will be the tamassrans who note my passing. I am their work. What I do is for my people, always.
WARDEN: They made you, but they can't make decisions for you.
STEN: No need. I have been trained to choose as they would. There is little point in pursuing this, we should move on.

"What makes [my life] mine?" Sten wonders. "It was theirs to begin with."

It's simple, it's sort of beautiful in its purity... and it's terrifying. To me, these words could just as easily have been said by Bull when we first speak to him in Haven about what it means to live under the Qun. Sten is, as always, both poignant and seriously scary here, utterly willing to spend himself as nothing more than a tool of his people... a blunt instrument against the untamed ones.

Meanwhile, those who remain clean and uncontaminated patrol the streets, vigilant against the "savage" ones who seek nothing more than the deaths of children and innocents... 

At least... so says Bull.

Is it really feasible that the Tal-Vashoth are spending their time sneaking around, poisoning children, slaughtering whole schools of children and their tamassrans... versus running as far away as they can get?

Pity the Children (Propaganda 101)

But what evidence do we have of this? 

Does it really make sense that the Tal-Vashoth are sticking around and victimizing innocents and children instead of making tracks as far away from Par Vollen, the Ben-Hassrath, their trained trackers and assasins, as they possibly can? Does it make sense that they're spending their time sneaking around, poisoning children, slaughtering whole schools of children and their tamassrans?

For me: Nope. It's all propaganda. And they use people like Bull as a mouthpiece. 

From the banters, take a second glance at this:

IRON BULL: Most Tal-Vashoth are nothing more than savages. Killing's all they know. The Ben-Hassrath are trying to lose fewer people to that sickness.
SOLAS: It isn't a sickness. You are losing them because they see a chance for freedom! And most of them are "savage," as you say, because your culture taught them nothing else. They know nothing but the Qun. So even as they fight against it, they are guided by its principles.
IRON BULL: Watch it, elf. You haven't seen the Tal-Vashoth like I have. Try watching a Tal-Vashoth kill a Tamassran and her kids. Then we'll talk.

The thing is, I am convinced that Bull hasn't seen this either, himself. Not really. 

I believe that in all likelihood, it is a fictional memory created and implanted by the Ben-Hassrath.

Looking back with the benefit of 20-20 hindsight, it seems apparent to me that Bull has not only been indoctrinated beautifully by the Qunari and Ben-Hassrath, but he's also been potentially, visibly manipulated at a level that is horrifying and invasive.

For instance... Let's talk about Bull's breakdown.

The events of Seheron and the loss of his friend Vasaad haunt Bull even in his days with the Inquisition.

Lost in Seheron

According to his own descriptions, further examined in World of Thedas, Volume 2, Bull encounters a Seheron merchant who poisons several of his men under pressure from rebels (the man also dies in the ensuing attack). It's a tragic situation; the man is a longstanding friend of Bull's, and he tries to communicate that something is wrong with his face and eyes. Bull gets the message, but it's too late—many of his men die, the man dies, and those manipulating him do as well.

That same poison is then used by a stubborn Tal-Vashoth group as they wreak terrible havoc and poison a school full of Qunari schoolchildren. Bull pursues them to a Tal-Vashoth stronghold and attacks without waiting for Ben-Hassrath permission. In the fight, Bull's best friend, a warrior named Vasaad, is killed before his eyes. Bull then sees red and goes mad with rage, evidently mowing down all attackers. 

The loss of his friend Vasaad haunts Bull, enough so that Cole comments on it in one of their conversations:

COLE: Vasaad was angry. He went first because he wanted to fight. Taking point, then points take him, red on his neck.
IRON BULL: I was just thinking about—wait, you in my mind again, kid?
COLE: Even if you went in first, there would have been another fight, another time he didn't listen. It wasn't your fault.
IRON BULL: Yes, it was. I was in charge. Should've found a way to—hey, that's pretty good. We could use that!
COLE: You can use sadness?
IRON BULL: Ben-Hassrath, kid. We can use anything.

His best friend Vasaad is dead. Bull's enemies are dead, littered in pieces around him. The battle over, Bull then sits down amidst the corpses of his foes and friends, grieving and silent, until the Ben-Hassrath agents discover him. The agents take him back to Par Vollen, where by Bull's own admission he asks them to either fix him or destroy him so that he will not be a danger to anyone else. It's heartbreaking, and so typical of Bull. He knows what a good killer he is. I just think he isn't always aware of how much of his persona was created outside of his own control or awareness.

Hidden Meanings

Is this the moment that changed Bull's life forever?
Or does it denote something more complicated—his guilt?

One little side note—visualize that moment of Bull sitting in mute and weary sorrow among the gruesome bodies of the dead, hands bloody. Where have we seen this image in-game? It's the scene we're presented on Bull's new Tarot card (which is itself the "Wheel of Fortune" card, signifying change) if Bull goes Tal-Vashoth.  Which is pretty interesting in its implications. Is the card itself actually using this moment as a touchstone? Is this the moment that changed Bull's life forever? Or does it denote something more complicated—his guilt? Over the lost lives on the Dreadnought... or the lives he took while hunting the Tal-Vashoth? 

Food for thought.

Meanwhile, back to that memorable and traumatic experience in Seheron, where I have to question whether Bull is a reliable narrator there.

In other words, did this ever really happen at all? Or did it happen differently, and the Ben-Hassrath changed Bull's memories? Because that's my point of view right now. That what Bull believes may not be anything close to what happened at all, and that everything he describes with such emotion is a false, expertly implanted memory, by the reeducators.

If so, this is pretty horrible, and it's a criminal, terribly invasive thing to do against one of the most intelligent and complex people we encounter in Thedas. And to me it's just so disturbing, and such an incredible violation of a companion who's so interesting, complicated and delightful. 

And it appears that Bull was in real trouble after that event, and that others rose to defend him. Want an extra dose of sadness? We discover, thanks to World of Thedas: Volume 2, that Gatt himself wrote a lengthy letter supporting Bull after those events in Seheron, showing his support for his friend and savior while also holding the Qun itself to task: "He's a good man. He believes in you. You owe him better than what you've done to him." I've never liked Gatt much, although I pitied him. But this made me love him. His real affection for Bull shines through here and it's devastating.

It's tantalizing to wonder if Gatt is actually talking about Bull's reeducation here, or if he's simply addressing the possibility for Bull to lose his standing under the Qun. Either way, Bull's reeducation also offends me on another level beyond the obvious disservice to a dedicated captain. After all, Bull's a brilliant man, with keen insights into human nature, a deep sense of empathy, a superb mind for strategy and subterfuge. The thought of the reeducators rummaging around in that mind, blacking out windows, hacking away memories they don't like, is, to me, on the level of someone spray-painting a Rembrandt. It's grotesque and offensive.

The thought of the reeducators rummaging around in Bull's mind, blacking out windows, hacking away memories they don't like, is, to me, on the level of someone spray-painting a Rembrandt. It's grotesque and offensive.

The Young Protector

If we go back to Bull's childhood tales, one of my favorite little details is that, despite the fact that he was always bigger and stronger, even as a kid, his first impulse was to save and protect other children. He was never a bully; at his core, Bull is always a giver, a protector. And it was something I know his Tama loved and treasured about little Ashkaari, in the days before he became a pawn of spies and liars (and what a gift it is, that Cole can confirm that for him).

Me, I believe the Ben-Hassrath saw, and with very keen eyes, what his Tama had seen: here was someone they could manipulate and twist to their will, as long as he believed he was taking care of those smaller and weaker than himself. So Bull was constantly reminded that the Tal-Vashoth were boogeymen, evil incarnate, terrible savages willing to kill children—acts so terrible Bull sought them out and slaughtered them to the last warrior, with the knowledge that his vengeance was righteous.

The banters in Inquisition give us a sense that Bull both enjoys and loathes his penchant for violence:

SERA: Wait, Bull. All that rot you said about hacking people.
IRON BULL: Yeah?
SERA: You do like it?
IRON BULL: Oh, yes. Finding someone who needs killing and just taking them apart… Brutally, skillfully, so their last living thought is realizing that I’m stronger and smarter than they are? Yeah, I like that a lot.
SERA: That’s weird.
IRON BULL: I didn’t say it was healthy. (pause) Look, I can either press those feelings down until I snap and hurt someone I care about… Or we can go find some bad guys who need to die.
SERA: (Nervously) Right. Bring on the baddies.

And yet, Cole also calls out Bull's true self, his desire not to kill:

IRON BULL: You're a fast little guy, Cole.
COLE: Do you wish you were faster, The Iron Bull?
IRON BULL: Nah. Just as soon stand there and let 'em come to me when they're ready to die.
COLE: Then it's them, not you. You don't want to kill. You want to defend.
IRON BULL: Hey, don't go around saying crap like that. I like killing.
COLE: But you give them a chance. You make them choose. So it's their fault.
IRON BULL: Just... come on, kid. You're making it weird.

But let's go back to that pivotal moment in Seheron—and wonder how much of Bull's memory is real...

It's tragic when you think about it. Bull hands his brilliant mind over to the reeducators and says, "Fix me."

Fact Versus Fiction...

Let's look at the logistics again, of Bull's memory of the fight and aftermath. To me, the school-poisoning just doesn't seem realistic. Remember, the Tal-Vashoth are basically freedom fighters. What they want more than anything else is not, I believe, to murder little kids, but to simply escape.

In addition, there's frustratingly little evidence that these famous "slaughters of children" ever took place. And they don't make any kind of sense at all. If you were Tal-Vashoth, and trying to flee the Qun, would you kill children and noncombatants? Sacrifice the helpless? Ensure that your cause was vilified by all?

AgaIt's not just evil, it's bad PR. To me, there's no way this stuff is real. None.

But this is what the Qunari needs Bull to believe. They need him to be their champion. So they feed him a constant diet of horror stories, knowing his psychology. He is an inveterate pleaser; a compulsive savior. He saves the stolen and avenges the lost. It's who he is.

It's tragic when you think about it. Bull hands his brilliant mind over to the reeducators and says, "Fix me." 

And what I think happens then is that the reeducators do a little mental excavation, a little reconstruction, to both change Bull's memories of what actually occurred while also reinforcing his horror for the Tal-Vashoth and their capabilities.

The closer I look at the crimes Bull is 'avenging,' the more certain I am that most of them occurred in other ways that he no longer recognizes or remembers. By the Qun itself or the Fog Warriors (as collateral damage). Even, in some cases, in setups that may have been designed to inspire and enrage Bull to greater loyalty. After all, let's not forget that he lasted longer in Seheron (exponentially!) than anyone else before him. Eight years longer.

Because he wanted save them. He wanted to save everybody. Because he might be The Iron Bull right now (and Hissrad underneath), but underneath them all is the little boy who just wanted to fight bullies. Ashkaari.

And the Qun used that, twisted it, manipulated that good impulse, honing Bull as a weapon... and as the useful tool he became. Until it was time to weigh that tool... or throw it away.

It's just what happens under the Qun.

Of Lore Traps and Stewed Nugs (May Update on Posts & Lore in Progress...)

COLE: We share the ancient mysteries, the feelings lost, forgotten dreams, unseen for ages, now beheld in wonder.

Hello, all you beautiful readers!

Thank you so much for your patience, those of you who follow and read my blog and social media posts. I'm so grateful, and first off, I want to send a thank-you to those of you who read my stuff, as well as those who may still be new to following me or my blog—thank you for reading!

However, as it's obvious that I've been a little slower than usual this past month or two, I wanted to share my situation... 

In a nutshell? The lore keeps tripping me up. In the best way. 

I fall into it, basically.

For instance, I have some exciting lore explorations in progress that I truly think are going to be really fun and worth the research, but the problem is... I've kept falling into those freaking lore traps. Each new fun question or exploration recently has led to a new issue for me to explore first, and each one of those turned out to be a doozy. 

And that's a good thing, not a bad thing, but it is frustrating and inconvenient. I'm used to spending a few weeks per post, but the latest have involved weeks of careful diagrams, notes, playthrough footage review, and more.

It slows me down. After all, I can't explore the tip of the pyramid if I don't explore the foundation, right?

So here we are.

The Innocent Hell of Wondering Where People Sleep

Here's a great example...

I had this fun idea to explore, see, based on some discussions I saw a long time ago, on "Where They Sleep," both at Haven and Skyhold, in Inquisition. This was such a fun, charming idea! What could be wrong with me exploring where all our favorite companions and advisors lay their heads, right? So I started research. 

And please note, this was NOT an original idea, and I will be crediting the original posters on the inspiration (and linking to them) as best I can, as always.

But, see, then I realized that nothing I posted would make sense without context. I could post where Cullen sleeps at Haven, or Skyhold, but then I might as well really do it right, also hypothesizing where Bull slept, or Cass. And what about Dorian? Does he actually sleep in the library at Skyhold? Come on! Of course he doesn't. Dorian would demand only the best. 

Diving into the Lore

And so, I began to ask questions. I was intrigued and frustrated. As my research progressed, I soon realized that it would not be a simple "fun" post after all (none of them). Because, with Dragon Age, lore rules over all. 

And so I became aware of a mountain of work ahead of me if I wanted to complete that exploration.

In other words... 

• I needed to completely map Skyhold
• I needed to do so from dungeon/basement to floors 1, 2, and 3 (and walk all battlements, noting all tent areas, towers, abandoned spaces, etc.)
• I needed to note all sleeping areas and workrooms
• I needed to, well, note everything

And then I did this, as best I could, and I was really happy with it, even if I kept moving Cole and Sera in a completely paranoid fashion, first by floors then by which side of the Herald's Rest they were on (sorry!). I mean, it was bad. I think I moved them six times. Sorry. I just kept second-guessing myself!

Also, I have no sense of direction. Which means that the idea of ME making a map of any kind is HILARIOUS. I mean, seriously. If someone had given me a spool of thread (like Varric did Merrill) I'd still be using it to get around this world. I sometimes get lost on my own block and have to look downhill to make sure I'm heading back home.

Yes, it's embarrassing. But it was a fun challenge, and the best part was... I would finally know my way around Skyhold instead of my usual approach of opening doors and feeling pleased when the rooms beyond were the ones I'd wanted to get to.

Mapping Skyhold

So it actually happened—I mapped Skyhold (wine cellar and all) and it felt terrific, like something tangible. (Of course, in updating the map for the sixth time while writing this, the entire post became corrupted, disappeared, and I had to rebuild it from scratch. It's been that kind of week.)

Regardless, then I (FINALLY!) moved forward with "Where They Sleep." 

Only to realize, yet again, for context, that I really might as well go ahead and completely map Haven. 

Again, as with Skyhold, emphasis on "Completely." Sigh.

But come on. If I'm gonna do this, why not do it right? If I'm gonna tell you where Cullen's tent is, why don't I tell you where EVERYTHING is?

I am a Terrible Blogger

So that's the scoop.

And... yeah. So now I've been working on completely mapping Haven, and where to find everyone, and where they sleep, and just... well, everything. And here we are. I'm finishing my Haven map, and I think it will be a real resource (as I hope will the Skyhold one) in perpetuity, for fans who may need the extra help.

Like all lore stuff, though, it's just proven to be more work than expected.

And I appreciate your patience. See, here's the thing: I love talking about what Solas wants or what Cole dreams or what Bull hides or what Anders survives, but I also want to make sure I'm offering more than just frilly word-cakes here. 

I want to provide insights you guys can actually use to play and enhance your gameplay and enjoyment of Dragon Age across the trilogy. I really want to balance that stuff with the lore, so that, yes, you can learn about Solas or Cole or Varric or Anders here, but I also want you to be able to reference questions you might have, about where people sleep or about where everything is at Skyhold, or what Solas's frescoes mean, or what was happening in that chess match, or whether Sera hides secrets of her own, and more.

And don't even get me started on the months of research and analysis I've spent on all the character Tarot card symbolism character by character, or on dissecting the Chant of Light. Or on the Evanuris, the Fade, the nature of the Titans, etc. I've attempted some rudimentary examinations, but there is always so much more to learn! So those are posts in progress right now, as well as character analyses of Varric, Dorian, Scout Harding, and of Solas and Bull's loyalty quests.

I also have some fun, short silly exercises I'll be sharing shortly as well, to break up all the heavier lore stuff. (So be afraid, be very afraid...)

Coming Soon...

So apologies, and thanks for bearing with me! I hate being silent, and appreciate your patience more than I can say.

If it helps, I also have some big book-length Dumped, Drunk & Dalish projects in the works for publication, and am going to be insanely excited to be able to share those next steps with you in the weeks to come. There have just been some legalities for me to solidify first, so that I've made sure that whatever I create (nonfiction analyses and critiques like those you see here, no fiction elements) is okay with BioWare and legal to publish.

Meanwhile, thank you for reading, and thank you for bearing with me. And a special thank-you to those who support me on Patreon and Ko-Fi! I so appreciate you, and I hope you'll find the additional upcoming content worth the wait.

Ma serannas, lethallen!